Pushing past pain

The Wall in the marathon is that place where your body breaks down, your legs turn to jelly and your body shuts down. Some people will stop, hoping to regain some energy and continue, while others push right through the wall, slowly agonizingly, and in many cases break through.

Learning happens at that edge along the Wall.

In fitness training, your muscles grow and respond to the training when they are stressed and in discomfort. They are uncomfortable. So the best training is to reach that point of discomfort continually with each exercise regimen. And what you'll find is that the point of discomfort begins to move away from you. It will begin to take longer to get uncomfortable.

I've run many marathons and I've hit the wall in some of them. I clearly hit the wall in the very first one I ran though I didn't know what was happening at that time, and I learned to deal with the experience. It would take a lot more to hit the wall after that.

But I have learned that anything worth experiencing has its own Wall. But not all the time. However, its when you're on that edge of the Wall that determines real growth.

It's easy to perform when you're feeling your greatest. It's much more difficult to move forward when you feel tired, agitated, depressed, grumpy and confused. That's the real-life Wall. During those times, if you can actually move forward, then real learning happens.

There are many times I don't feel like working. And I sit and stare at my computer screen and sometimes convince myself that I should watch YouTube for a few minutes, till I feel better.

Or wait till the Muse appears before I type a single sentence. After all, writing when uninspired will probably lead to uninspiring work. That's what I tell myself, and it's very convincing. A couple of hours later, I'm glued to YouTube watching series after series of Air Crash Disaster, wondering where the time went.

GETTING STARTED

In many cases, getting started may be difficult. There are too many things waiting to be done, and all of them are calling for attention. They all seem equally important, and all of them want you to pay attention to them. So you sit and pay attention to none of them.

But if you got started on one of them, you'd feel better about getting on the road. At least I do. Just picking at something boring you right out of your skull, and working slowly, but persistently, watching and feeling and thinking to yourself that you'd rather be somewhere else, but still persisting.

Writing but still waiting for the Muse to appear.

Taking that exercise walk, but wishing you were somewhere else.

Documenting that code in that software application you've been writing, waiting for inspiration to come, but still doing something useful.

Collecting your tax papers together, and starting to fill them in, while wondering and being confused as to whether you have everything you need, or if something is missing - but moving ahead anyway.

MOTIVATION

George Carlin once joked about motivation, motivational books I think. If you were motivated enough to get out of bed and get to the store and buy the book then you're already motivated, so leave the book alone and go about your business. Or something like that.

I don't know what motivation is, but routine trumps motivation. A routine is like working in an assembly line. You don't have to be motivated since the work is repetitive and routine and involved very little of your creative, defensive self. Writing a book could be considered assembly line work. So could being a great chef, or a mechanic. Or any task for that matter. Even in science, poking into the depths of the unknown, stumbling in the dark, looking for that which you know not what it is can be trying. So you make it routine and follow it.

Sooner or later, you break through the Wall.

And you don't realize that you are actually being productive. And inspiration has nothing to do with it. Confucius said, It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop. And Samuel Jackson is quoted to have said, Great works are performed, not by strength, but by perseverance.

THE TRICK IS TO KEEP GOING

The trick is to keep on moving even when everything inside you is telling you to stop. This is incredibly difficult to do when you can look around you and think of a million other things that your attention can be drawn to. In the marathon, simply the reprieve you get from stopping and breathing calmly gnaws at you and many people do actually stop, and many cannot get the engines going again.

But when you're working on a project and you reach the wall, and you look outside and see the blue sky, or you think of a cheeseburger, or a stake, or sitting on your couch doing nothing, it's difficult not to resist all these activities, better than what you're doing right now, all competing for your attention.

The trick is really, very simply, to keep moving on, slowly, trudging. So, not by strength, but by perseverance.

As I sit here writing this, my motorcycle is in the garage calling me. Telling me that in an hour or two, it will be raining, or dark, or rush hour traffic will be on the roads, so this is the best time to go outside and have a ride. This writing can wait till later, but the writing cannot.

So I'm slogging through it, since I have a point to make, and the point is being made while it's actually happening. 4pm on a Monday after a tough day after the weekend, and this topic seemed to be calling me to write it. Asking me to do what I say should be done, instead of going out for a bike ride.

PUSHING PAST THE WALL

While you are inside the wall, the conflict between what needs to be done and what you want to do are constantly at battle. In many cases, the want wins, and the need suffers.